Things NOT to say to someone with an Invisible disability or Chronic Illness
But you don’t look sick
Everyone gets tired
You’re just having a bad day
Must be nice not having to go to work
I wish I had time to get a nap
If you’d get out more
You just need more exercise
It can’t be that bad
It’s all in your head
You’re just depressed
There are people worse off than you
You’ll just have to tough it out
This too shall pass
You have what? I’ve never heard of it
Aren’t you feeling better yet?
I’ll pray you get better
It’s not God’s will that you’re sick
But you look just fine
You’re taking too much medicine
You need to change your diet
Losing weight might help
If you had a more positive attitude
I thought they stopped diagnosing people with that (because it’s not real)
I’ve heard many of these, thankfully not all. I have a very supportive group of friends and family. One of my friends even asked for an opposite list. What do you say to support someone with a chronic illness or invisible disability?
That took me off guard. I had to think about that a bit. How would I feel supported by a comment from someone who doesn’t really know what I’m going through (after all, you don’t get it till you get it)?
Hmm, maybe these comments:
Is this a bad day or a less bad day?
What do you find helpful with pain, energy, sleep, etc?
Is there any way we can help address some of your issues at church? (accessibility)
Can we help you with anything?
How can I pray for you?